In Memory of Ruby

Mike and I went back to the Neonatal Unit last night to hand over the money that all our friends and family had so generously donated - a total of £2835. We arranged to meet the Matron Karen and the Paediatrician Shelley who had looked after Ruby for the time we were there.

It felt strange to be back in the unit but in some ways a good thing to do to help with our healing. It was so great to see Shelley again and we both burst into tears when we saw each other. She really was such an amazing person and we believe went beyond the call of duty to help Ruby and support us. In fact the whole team on duty that weekend were amazing and really supported our families too during such a traumatic time.

They have decided to use the money to buy a syringe driver (costing £2100) and with the remainder have agreed with us to buy a tree and possibly a bench to put in the gardens that are directly underneath the unit. This will be so great as we will be able to have a plaque put there with Rubys name and details both on the bench and by the tree.

So, a wonderful memory of our beautiful girl will be everlasting in the garden and a piece of much needed equipment will be provided to help another little baby.

We are so proud of our girl and thank everyone again for their kind donations.

A Wedding in a Castle

Last month was my brother Jons wedding so Mike and I headed off up north to Cumbria for the event. The wedding was being held in a beautiful place called Augill Castle, a favourite venue for Jon and Jo's band.

Jon and Jo had sole use of the castle for the weekend so when we arrived there they were standing at the door to greet everyone as if it were their own home. Our room was amazing, breathtaking views, our very own turrets no less and the biggest bed you have ever seen. The bath also lived up to the bed on the sizeometer too. All the rooms were like this so we all spent the first hour or so nosing around everyone elses boudoirs.

Saturday night and Jon and Jo had organised dinner for friends where we all sat around a huge dining table eating gorgeous food. It was a great evening and I was able to catch up with some of Jons oldest friends, people I haven't seen for years. What was also so good was that most people spoke to us about Ruby and said how sorry they were and I was able to show photos of her to a few people. That made me feel so proud.


The wedding was the following day and Jon and Jo both looked amazing. I have never seen Jon look so happy. Following the ceremony we all took lots of photos outside in the grounds armed with glasses of pimms. The evening celebrations continued and a polaroid camera was provided for all guests to take a photos and add a caption. Lucy and James had planned to sabotage the happy couples car so armed with keys we all snuck out to blow up as many balloons as was humanly possible and stuffed them all in their car. The traditonal just married and tin cans finalised the makeover and we slipped in a polaroid of the guilty gang on the dashboard for good measure.

The following day we watched Jon and Jo pull off in their car complete with balloons towards their campsite where they were about to start their tour of the UK in their silver van.



This was the first time Mike and I really enjoyed ourselves since we had Ruby, it was such a great weekend. A long, wet and windy drive back down south completed our lovely trip away,

Learning to Live Again

As all of you will know, Mike and I have been recovering from the tragic death of our beloved daughter Ruby. It has been nearly 6 months and the road we have travelled has been long and hard and full of dark and very scary places. The journey is far from over, but we have made progress in restoring our lives again without our beautiful girl.

It is in fact Ruby who keep us going.

We moved to Whitstable so that we could live our life as a family by the sea and living here has really been one of the most dominent factors in our healing process. Living by the sea is really such a special place, the sea is such a powerful force. The wildness of the landcape in the winter is such an exilerating place to be and being by this element at a time when your emotions are so raw, makes you face your fears and confront your grief. The sea is also a very calm and healing place. It is somewhere to think, to cry and to be comforted. The sea also tells us by the very nature of the turning of the tides that time will keep moving.

And thats exactly what Mike and I have had to do, keep moving, learning to live again.